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Lastly, my wife doesn’t like having sex if she knows any of the kids are awake. Locking the door to our room isn’t enough of a mental/physical barrier. So at this point, it’s a matter of endurance (staying awake longer than our teenagers). With our busy schedules, we are both tired and end up falling asleep before them regularly. When we do manage to stay awake, the sex is quiet and groggy. There are a lot of instances in which you may be looking to try ball stretchers but don’t know where to start!

That FOMO you describe will be with you, regardless of which path you take, until you tackle where the FOMO is coming from itself. The transparency you want to proceed with requires introspection on your end about these subjects. From there, it might take some time (or it might happen on your first date) to find someone who is as open to discussing the details of sex and dating desires as you are. Safer dating guidelines include letting a trusted friend know where you are, who you’re with, and when to expect to hear from you. If you go to their home or a hotel, let your trusted friend know about the change in location and keep track of where your belongings are in case you need to grab your purse and shoes and exit quickly. There are dating sites and apps that attract people who are looking for, or even simply open to, the kind of casual sex you say you’re looking for.

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