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Sharing sex toys with other people can spread STDs — if someone who has an STD uses a sex toy, the body fluids on that toy can spread the infection to the next person who uses that toy. So if you’re using a sex toy with a partner, it’s important to take steps to help prevent STDs. There are so many different kinds of sex toys and ways to use them that figuring out where to start can feel a little overwhelming. Going to a sex toy shop and asking someone who works there about different products can be a great way to learn more about sex toys and what might work well for you. You can also just try something that seems interesting and go from there. Or you may decide sex toys aren’t for you, and that’s totally OK too.

Its size and shape suggest it may have been hand-held, with the belief that its form would imbue the food or ingredients being prepared with magical properties. Brides-to-be performed a ceremony in honor of Mutunus Tutunus, the phallic god. This ritual involved the bride losing her virginity by penetrating herself with a divinely symbolic dildo before the wedding. This remains a near-constant anxiety until even in modern-day Texas, where it is still illegal to possess or promote the use of (six or more) dildos.

Yet they “aren’t in any way guaranteed to work better for couples than any other toys,” she explains. Don’t apologize or shy away from your own desires either, as that’s a good way to build up anxiety and stress on one or both sides of the conversation. “Most of us want our partners to have pleasure during sex, and will be willing to seek higher forms of pleasure together,” Leigh notes.

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