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You might think this looks like a regular schmegular sex toy, but oh dear reader, how wrong you are.Why? Because the shaft and clit stimulator of the Hot Lover toy by Satisfyer heat up. Which means you leave the controls of the vibrator up to someone else as well. Don’t expect any hair or lint stuck to it, even if it’s accidentally left under your duvet. It’s subtle enough that house guests will assume it’s just a regular shower head… Simply click between settings using a single button control to choose between an opulent shower or an intense water-driven orgasmic stimulation – god it’s great fun.The only con?

The new design of the Onyx provides up to 140 strokes per minute and simulates intercourse like no other with its up-and-down “milking” motion. If you prefer gentler, pinpointed stimulation, the Lelo Dot may be the best choice for you. The teardrop-shaped Dot looks a bit odd at first glance, but its accessible design offers focused clitoral stimulation. The Aer is completely waterproof, and its exterior is made from a single piece of soft matte silicone.

You see—and I am addressing the creators of the Balldo when I say “you” here—inserting any kind of phallus into any kind of orifice requires some amount of force or leverage. We use our hips, our core, our arms, etc. to provide the force necessary to perform the penetrative sex that the Balldo is so hyperfixated on. The Balldo is so confident in its assertion that penetration is the only way to have sex that it asks you to strap a hollow silicone dildo to your testicles to prove you agree, and fully expects you to pay $80 for the privilege. Crops tend to deliver a more piercing/stinging sensation, whereas paddles are often referred to as “thuddy.” Floggers can be either, depending on the shape and brand. There are sleeves that can heat up, vibrate, pulsate, and simulate anal and oral sex.

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